


Trust / Surrender

by naughtybutinagoodway, she_blinks (naughtybutinagoodway)



Series: Lovers / Spies [6]
Category: Atomic Blonde (2017)
Genre: Angst, F/F, Fix-It, Lesbian Character, Lesbian Sex, Porn with Feelings, Post-Canon, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-19
Updated: 2018-05-19
Packaged: 2019-05-08 19:49:19
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,235
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14700999
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/naughtybutinagoodway/pseuds/naughtybutinagoodway, https://archiveofourown.org/users/naughtybutinagoodway/pseuds/she_blinks
Summary: Lorraine and Delphine prepare for the impending disruption to the relationship in very different ways. Delphine wanted to shore up the strength of their emotional bonds. Lorraine, a woman of action, made preparations to see Delphine while under deep cover, without approval of her employer. Will it be enough for their relationship?





	Trust / Surrender

**Author's Note:**

> This took MUCH longer to post than I had intended. Happy things disrupted my writing flow. And also contributed a few ideas incorporated into this work. I have to warn you, this is a big ball of fluffy fluff. And the bits that I intended to be NSFW have turned out to be disappointingly vanilla. I can’t bear to look at it anymore, so I’m posting as is. I hope you’re still able to enjoy it!

#### \--------- Wednesday morning ----------

Lorraine woke before Delphine and watched her sleeping form. Delphine was lying on her back, with her legs spread slightly … one foot touched Lorraine’s leg, one hand rested under Lorraine’s hip. Her other arm was above her head, palm side up, on the pillow.

Lorraine wondered … aside from the fucking, would waking next to Delphine be what she missed most?

Or would it be the anticipation of knowing that she was going to see Delphine … in a week, a day, at the end of a cab ride?

Or seeing the look on Delphine’s face when she realizes that Lorraine is alive, if not injury-free? And then allowing Delphine to take care of her injuries? The tenderness with which she did so?

Or stealing looks at Delphine’s body when they were out and about, but getting caught anyway? And enjoying the reaction it occasioned?

Knowing there was no ready answer, Lorraine switched to enjoying the feel of the woman lying next to her. She ran her fingers very lightly over Delphine’s arm, grazing her skin so gently that she felt fine peach fuzz. The touch didn’t quite wake Delphine, but she did turn her head slightly toward Lorraine. She smelled Delphine’s hairline where, in the early morning, it smelled of her essence.

Lorraine decided that what she would miss most was in fact a series of events … when Delphine filled her senses for the first time each day. Before the world caught up to them. Lorraine had already experienced her first sight, her first touch and her first smell of Delphine. And so she leaned in to complete this morning’s sensory experience.

Lorraine pressed her body close and used her tongue to pull Delphine’s earlobe between her teeth. But a taste of earlobe wasn’t all that Lorraine was after. Knowing that Delphine would turn her head toward the nibbles, she then moved her mouth to Delphine’s lips. Their warm breath mingled when Delphine opened her mouth to squeak a protest at being woken. Lorraine explored her mouth with a gently probing tongue, and Delphine’s tongue responded in kind. Lorraine felt Delphine’s mouth form into a smile. She placed kisses on Delphine’s lips and pulled back to enjoy watching Delphine wake.

Delphine’s smile continued to grow as her eyes slowly opened. When she focused on Lorraine’s eyes, Delphine’s smile lasted briefly before it slowly started to dissipate.

And Lorraine knew … Delphine’s pleasure at waking next to her, in her bed, dissolved as wakefulness took hold, as realization replaced sleepy bliss. As Delphine remembered that the future would be very different for them.

They held each other’s gaze until Delphine slowly crawled on top of Lorraine. She cradled Lorraine’s head in her arms and rested her head in the nape of Lorraine’s neck.

Lorraine placed her spread hands on Delphine’s back. They held each other in this way for several minutes, until Lorraine felt warms tears fall along her cheek. She tried to roll Delphine off of her slightly, so that they could face each other again. But Delphine resisted. And so Lorraine wrapped her arms around Delphine and tightened her hold.

Lorraine understood … over the past year, she and Delphine had been together for thirty-eight of them. She too had lived more in those thirty-eight days than she had in her previous fifteen years.

#### \-------------------

Delphine thought about their final words from the previous night …

_Do you know how many days we have spent together?_ And Lorraine had answered, without hesitation. _Thirty-eight._

It was the longest relationship for both Delphine and Lorraine. And yet, in many ways, the relationship felt like it was still shiny and new. Neither took their relationship for granted, because of the emotional vacuum created by the very nature of their profession. The _trust no one_ mentality, necessary for survival, pushed agents toward treating even allies as potential enemies. And _primacy of mission_ meant that even loyal agents could become expendable without a moment’s notice, all to further mission objectives. Adversaries and the walking dead are never wise choices for relationships of any sort, personal and professional.

And yet not only had their relationship defied the odds, but Delphine knew that it bore all the hallmarks of a great love affair … they just never spoke of the emotions openly.

> _I don’t want to communicate with anyone else … I want you to let me into those places in your heart where you hide your emotions, where words are unnecessary._

Delphine only had three days left to mine those very places. Lorraine’s long-term assignment was the first real test of their relationship. And Delphine wanted to use the remaining three days they had together to get them on firm emotional footing … on equal emotional footing. Delphine knew with only three days remaining, a complete shift of the power dynamics between Delphine and Lorraine was needed.

Delphine knew that specific sexual acts had induced vulnerability, euphoria and sensuality in them both. She wanted to use those same physical experiences to jumpstart their intimacy for the second half of her US visit. And Delphine wanted Lorraine to surrender all control.

She sat up to break Lorraine’s embrace. “I’ll be right back.”

Delphine hopped up out of bed and ran, naked, into the closet. When she stepped out of the closet, Delphine had her camera and tripod. As Delphine opened up blinds and set up the tripod, Lorraine propped herself up on her elbows. “You’re going to take pictures? Now?”

Delphine pointedly looked at Lorraine. “Yes, pictures. Reminders of our time together.” She looked away to load film into the camera and attached it to the tripod. “I want to take lots of pictures during our next three days together.”

Lorraine, knowing that she had not been upfront with Delphine about her impending mission, felt that she needed to tread lightly with her questions. “Are you going to move the camera into the living area?”

“No, I plan on us spending time here, in the bedroom, this morning.”

“Let me put on some clothes.” She made a motion as if she was getting out of bed.

“No, stay.” Delphine spoke a bit more forcefully that intended. “No one is going to see these pictures except for me. I will develop them.” She placed the camera and tripod at the foot of the bed, so that it wouldn’t cast a shadow. Delphine adjusted the height and direction of the tripod. Next she attached the long cable release and focused the camera. While standing behind the camera, Delphine took a couple of pictures of an amused Lorraine.

Delphine walked back to the bed and crawled astride Lorraine again, with the cable release still in her hand. She leaned forward and held her face next to Lorraine’s, their lips not quite touching. Lorraine moved her face closer and licked Delphine’s lips. Lorraine heard the _*click click*_ of the camera shutter as Delphine plunged the cable release. She smiled into the kiss before pulling back. “Sneaky. What are you hoping to take pictures of?”

Delphine whispered into Lorraine’s ear, “I have some ideas.”

“Of course you do. Mind sharing?”

Rather than answer, Delphine tugged on both of Lorraine’s hands, indicating that she wanted the blonde to lay flat on her back. Once Lorraine did so, Delphine placed Lorraine’s arms at her side and pinned her hands under her knees.   _*click click*_

Delphine leaned down and kissed Lorraine deeply. Their tongues probed each other’s mouths. Delphine withdrew her tongue and nibbled Lorraine’s lower lip firmly.   _*click click*_  Delphine felt a familiar reaction from her lover – a soft grinding of her hips. When Lorraine groaned and tried to move her hands to entangle her fingers into Delphine’s hair, the brunette broke off the kiss entirely and sat up.

“Lorraine, you are not to move. Not your arms, not your legs. Even your head should stay still. Do you understand?”

“Okay.” Lorraine smiled mischievously. “You’re in control.”

“Stay here.”

Delphine dropped the cable release and tip-toed into the kitchen. Lorraine could hear her dishwasher being opened. When Delphine returned, she had both the purple and the pink dildo in her hands. She was looking from one to the other, as if she was trying to decide which she favored.

“You … _cleaned_ them.” It was more a statement than a question. Lorraine sat up.

Delphine looked up and made eye contact with Lorraine. “Yes, in the dishwasher.” Her smile was brief, as if she were already thinking of something else. Delphine picked up the cable release plunger and climbed back onto the bed. She sat on Lorraine’s thighs and put her arms around Lorraine’s head, resting her elbows on the blonde’s shoulders.

Delphine again whispered into Lorraine’s ear, “Can I tie you up?” Delphine placed a light kiss at the corner of Lorraine’s mouth.

Lorraine raised her eyebrows.  _*click click*_  She wasn’t expecting _that_ question. “You don’t trust me to be still?”

“No. And I also want you to yield to me.”

Lorraine exhaled lightly out of her nose and smiled. “I feel like I’m just a half-step behind you this morning. You’re full of surprises.”

Delphine leaned over towards the nightstand. She opened the drawer and pulled out the strap-on harness and bundles of soft cotton rope. Sitting next to Lorraine, Delphine traced a tendon along her neck with a finger.

“I also want you to wear the strap-on.”

“Delphine, should I be afraid?”

“Mmm hmm.” _*click click*_ “Lay down.” Delphine pushed Lorraine gently on the shoulder.

Delphine arranged Lorraine so that the camera had a view from her side. Delphine used a bundle of rope to tie Lorraine’s upper arms to her side at the armpits. The rope encircled Lorraine’s chest twice above and below her breasts. The fibers of the rope, combined with the friction of the turns and knots, held the strands together. Delphine then brought the rope from the back to Lorraine’s chest on both sides of her neck and between her breasts. When she was finished tying Lorraine’s upper arms, the end result was a simple chest harness of rope. _*click click*_ Lorraine spoke with a low voice, her excitement evident, “You’ve gotten pretty good at this.”

Delphine looked at Lorraine through her lashes and licked her lips. “You look beautiful. How do you feel?”

“I’m comfortable.” Delphine knew that Lorraine enjoyed a bit of pain with her restraint.

“Good.” The pleasure was evident in Delphine’s voice. She placed pillows behind Lorraine’s head and shoulders to give her better sightlines to the action.

Next, Delphine pulled the strap-on harness up to Lorraine’s hips and inserted the pink dildo. She positioned the dildo at Lorraine’s pubic bone and then cinched the harness tightly around her legs and hips. _*click click*_

Next, Delphine secured Lorraine’s hands on either side of her hips with several turns of rope. And finally, Delphine secured Lorraine’s ankles to the corners of the bed. _*click click*_

Delphine checked the focus of the camera once more, than came over and kneeled next to Lorraine. “Are you okay? Anything too tight?”

Before Lorraine could answer, Delphine swung a leg over Lorraine’s abdomen and slowly lowered herself down. _*click click*_

#### \-------------------

Lorraine loved the feel of Delphine’s cunt on her stomach, but couldn’t resist the urge to tease. “I’m fine. But you missed your target by about …” she leaned her head to the side slightly, as if gauging distance, “… six inches or so.”

“Stay focused. The only thing you can say is our word to stop. Which is …?”

“Sinead.” They smiled at each other momentarily. “So I don’t have to move or tal …” Lorraine was silenced by Delphine’s fingers on her lips. Delphine leaned down and kissed Lorraine deeply again.

Delphine broke off the kiss and scooted forward on her knees. Lorraine bit down on the areola of the breast placed at her lips and flipped the hard nipple with tip of her tongue. Delphine moaned, open-mouthed, and arched her back to pull her nipple out of Lorraine’s mouth. She traced the hard nipple over Lorraine’s chin and toward her neck, leaving a faint wet trail. _*click click*_

Delphine replaced her nipple with her tongue, and licked down Lorraine’s neck to the top of her sternum. When her mouth reached the rope cords, Delphine took them into her mouth and chewed lightly on them. Lorraine watched her teeth, her lips, intently.

Delphine continued her mouth’s path toward Lorraine’s right nipple, biting and licking it as Lorraine had done to her own. Delphine cupped Lorraine’s free breast in one hand and stroked the nipple to hardness, to see if she could elicit a reaction. Lorraine closed her eyes, but did not make a sound other than taking deep breaths. Delphine stroked Lorraine’s taut stomach with her other hand.

Delphine kissed down Lorraine’s abdomen and, reaching the rope that bound her hands, kissed the cords of rope with her full lips. Next she kissed a path to the insides of Lorraine’s thighs. Lorraine held her breath until Delphine slowly looked up and made eye contact with her. _*click click*_

Delphine crawled on all fours so that her limbs were astride Lorraine’s torso. The blonde enjoyed the view through Delphine’s arms and down her muscular abdomen, the sightline interrupted only by Delphine’s firm breasts.

When Delphine’s hips were over Lorraine’s stomach, she straightened up, to kneel on her knees. Lorraine watch as Delphine’s right hand disappeared between her folds. Her arms reflexively pulled against the rope … she wanted to touch Delphine, participate in whatever was about to happen. She grunted in frustration.

Delphine slowly removed her hand and Lorraine noted that her fingers were coated with wetness. A small groan escaped Lorraine’s lips. Delphine placed her wet fingers on Lorraine’s lips, as if to quiet her. She drew her fingers across Lorraine’s lips, smearing her wetness. Lorraine inhaled slowly, to enjoy the intoxicating smell. When she moved her head and opened her lips slightly, to lick Delphine’s fingers, she drew a rebuke from the brunette.

“Mais non.” Lorraine’s efforts thwarted and having been reprimanded, Lorraine quieted and stilled her reaction. Delphine leaned forward and held her lips just a few millimeters from Lorraine’s. Her eyes were warm, but slightly challenging. After several prolonged seconds of feeling Delphine’s breath on her face, Lorraine craved a touch or kiss to answer her growing desire.

Lorraine felt that she could take no more of the intimacy purgatory when Delphine leaned forward and licked her wetness off of Lorraine’s lips. _*click click*_ Then she slid her tongue along Lorraine’s, sharing the sweet tang. The kiss was soft, searching, as if promising that there was more to come.

The more to come was worth the wait. Delphine lifted herself over the dildo, and after easing herself slowly down onto the cock, turned to watch Lorraine’s reaction. As the dildo became fully seated in her pussy, Delphine’s eyes went from challenging, to hooded, to closed. _*click click*_ Her moan of pleasure filled the space between the two women.

Using her arms to brace herself, Delphine moved her hips forward and thrust herself back again. Once she found the rhythm that suited her, Delphine adjusted the angle of entry by leaning back over Lorraine’s thighs.

Lorraine enjoyed the view. Delphine sweetened the view further by touching her clit.  Lorraine focused on the emotions to which she was yielding. Yes, being tied up made Lorraine feel pleasantly confined, almost comforted. She was completely unaware of everyday chatter and focused only on Delphine and their shared experience.

She was also aware that, having been bound and rendered helpless, her awareness of tactile, sensual and imaginative sensations had increased. Lorraine enjoyed the sounds of Delphine satisfying herself. The pressure on her hips created when Delphine thrust herself onto the strap-on. The constriction around her chest when Delphine grabbed the rope harness for leverage.  The sharp pleasure whenever Delphine bit her nipples. The sense of feeling exposed and available with her legs tied apart. Lorraine imagined that Delphine focused on the sensations of being stretched, filled, sated.

But most of all, Lorraine became aware of the levels of trust that existed between herself and Delphine.

#### \-------------------

This awareness of deepening trust was exactly what Delphine was after when she suggested the bondage exercise.

After having climaxed and catching her breath while lying on top of Lorraine, Delphine moved to kneel beside the blonde and begun untying the rope that bound her wrists. Once the rope was removed, Delphine pulled the straps fully out of the clips to remove the strap-on.

Delphine positioned herself between Lorraine’s open legs. She became aware of Lorraine’s hastened breathing, her wanton wetness. _*click click*_

Delphine wanted to use Lorraine for her continued enjoyment. Not to have another orgasm, but to completely control Lorraine’s sexual satisfaction. Delphine decided that Lorraine, having given herself over completely to Delphine’s control, was entitled to release.

Without preamble, Delphine took Lorraine’s clit into her mouth. In response to Lorraine’s groan and slight rolling of her hip, Delphine stilled the tip of her tongue at the opening to her cunt. Lorraine tried to quiet her noises and hips, likely thinking that she had again broken the rules of play. Delphine earnestly took to the task of stroking the flat of her tongue along the full length of Lorraine’s pussy.

When Lorraine again allowed quiet moans to escape her lips, and they weren’t met with a stoppage of pleasure, she felt free to react unfettered. Lorraine’s legs strained against the ropes around her ankles, and she finally grabbed Delphine’s head with both hands. _*click click*_

Lorraine pulled Delphine’s head into her center and lifted her hips, to increase the pressure on her clit. Delphine responded by increasing the pace of her tongue. She relinquished the camera shutter and placed the palm of her hand on Lorraine’s lower stomach. Delphine entered Lorraine with two fingers, and used her palm to provide counter-pressure to the strokes of the fingers.

“My god, Delphine.”

It took only a few synchronized strokes of her tongue and fingers to bring Lorraine to the brink of orgasm. Delphine slowed her pace slightly, which focused Lorraine on the sensations more acutely. And when she did so, Lorraine’s groaning subsided, her abdomen rose and fell sharply, and she clenched the muscles of her body rhythmically.

Suddenly, Lorraine’s back arched backward, as she simultaneously contracted with spasms powerful enough to shake the bed. After taking a deep breath, her first in several seconds, Lorraine finally made a noise, a whimper, to signal complete surrender to Delphine.

Delphine moved to untie Lorraine from her remaining bindings, first at her ankles and then at her chest. She moved to lie alongside Lorraine and looked into her eyes. What she saw … that their morning had been enough to establish the connection that she was seeking for them both.  The trust and vulnerability extended by Lorraine was met with respect and protection from Delphine. Their remaining time together would be explored from the context of the new dynamics, deep bonds, established during the morning.

#### \-------------------

Over the next three days, Delphine’s camera was a constant companion. Delphine decided that Lorraine had the best approach after all regarding their final three days together … instead of focusing on the dwindling time they had remaining together, the women savored every moment.

Delphine captured everyday moments … preparing meals, drinking coffee and sorting of mail. She captured photographs at various times of the day, but especially the evenings, as both she and Lorraine were night owls. The captured moments were a mix of outdoor and indoor shots. Walking to the store and reaching for a towel after a shower. All in all, Delphine used over ten rolls of film.

Lorraine even got in on the act, taking the camera from Delphine to photograph the brunette occasionally.

Saturday morning finally arrived, the day that Delphine was due to fly back to Paris.  The morning began like any other morning they spent together … except that pleasurable activities were tinged with the knowledge that they would not be experienced again for quite some time.

As usual, Lorraine woke first and waited for Delphine to slowly join her in wakefulness. After leisurely lovemaking, probably the most leisurely of their relationship, both women held each other for most of the morning. When they finally got out of bed, Lorraine brewed coffee for them both. They drank their coffee across from each other at the dining table, smiling at each other, barely speaking.

After drinking the coffee, Lorraine followed Delphine out onto the terrace, where their week together had begun. Lorraine stood behind Delphine, pressing her hips into the brunette’s hips, her chest onto the brunette’s back. She touched her cheek to Delphine’s and placed her arms on either side of her chest.

Delphine started their conversation. “You do not need to tell me when you are leaving the country, but can you tell me that you’ll be in the country for at least one more week?”

“Yes, I should be. I should be here for at least two weeks. Why?”

“I will be mailing you something.”

“I was hoping you were going to say that you’ll stay longer.”

Delphine turned around in Lorraine’s arms, to face her. “That is not a good idea. Kurzfeld told me to end our relationship, by the end of this week.”

“He did what?” Lorraine wasn’t able to hide the bitter edge in her voice. She clenched and unclenched her jaw. Delphine could see Lorraine make an effort to loosen her countenance as she leaned in to whisper into Delphine’s ear.

“I have made some preparations … for us. So we can see other while I’m on assignment.”

Delphine’s eyes grew larger as she pulled back to look into Lorraine’s. She had no idea that Lorraine was planning on ‘going rogue’ in order to see her occasionally.

Lorraine leaned in, ostensibly to kiss Delphine on the cheek. Instead she leaned in to whisper again into Delphine’s ear. “If you ever receive a message with our safe word, you’ll know that it means I am trying to arrange a … rendezvous.”

Delphine’s breathing picked up pace. She had no idea that seeing Lorraine was a possibility.

Lorraine continued. “The message may come in many forms. A letter. A note slipped into your bag. A phone call, maybe from Merkel.  The message will hint at an address only … you’re to meet me one day later.”

Lorraine spoke quickly, efficiently, to explain the how and when they would see each other over the coming months.

There was a noticeable change in the mood for the remainder of Delphine’s time with Lorraine. Despite the impending departure time, the knowledge that seeing each was a possibility brightened Delphine’s mood considerably. And Lorraine was pleased to have brought about this change.

As Lorraine kissed Delphine goodbye, she whispered into the brunette’s ear, “Sinead will contact you as soon as possible.”

#### \-------------------

Eight days after Delphine returned to Paris, a package arrived for Lorraine. And inside the package was a manila envelope, with Lorraine’s name written in marker on the outside. Similar to the one that Delphine left for Lorraine in her flat in Berlin, the night that Lorraine saved Delphine from Percival’s murderous intentions.

The envelope contained a note and a stack of photographs. The note was short and sweet.

> _Photographic evidence of those places in your heart. I know how you feel … I feel the same._

As Lorraine flipped through the photos, her memory was flooded with not only the emotions felt during their last three days together. But also the memories of the previous year referenced during those three days.

In nearly all of the photos, the camera had been trained on Lorraine’s face. Not only was a moment in time captured on film, but the depth of Lorraine’s feelings for Delphine as well.

Of the photos taken during their morning scene, Lorraine was reminded of the physical and emotional longing that brought them together at the end of every assignment ...

> The moment Delphine suggested binding her with rope, Lorraine felt pleasant surprise.
> 
> Delphine tying the rope harness around her chest … breathless anticipation.
> 
> Delphine leaving a faint wet trail over Lorraine’s chin and neck in the wake of her hard nipple … shared passion.
> 
> Delphine kissing the insides of Lorraine’s thighs, making eye contact with her … promised release.

Of the photos taken in the lazy moments following the scene, as they were going about their day, Lorraine was reminded of the contentment they felt as their need for each other was replaced by the sweet, deep ache that results from intense lovemaking …

> Lorraine tickling Delphine as they lay on a lounge chair … playful affection.
> 
> Lorraine carrying two rocks glasses and a bottle of vodka, huge smile on her face ... eager expectancy.
> 
> Lorraine turning to Delphine to ask her what she wants in her salad … blissful familiarity.
> 
> Lorraine waking up, rolling over … comfortable intimacy.

There were photos in the envelope taken prior to Delphine’s stateside visit, throughout the previous year. And when Lorraine viewed the pictures from early in their relationship to those taken during Delphine’s visit, she couldn’t deny the emerging euphoria, adoration, trust …

Lorraine gathered up all the photos and put them back into the envelope. She resolved to see Delphine as often as possible during her assignment. And to complete the assignment as quickly as feasible.

The thing between Delphine and Lorraine, captured so clearly on film, could not be allowed to wither.

**Author's Note:**

> This was so vanilla, I’d proudly let my first grade teacher read it. *sighs* If you somehow enjoyed this work, please drop a line and let me know. How do you think the ladies should deal with Lorraine’s long-term assignment?! What should their safe have been?


End file.
